feeling better

I sure hope this lasts.... I feel pretty good right now, not my normal self still.... I think its stress! The stress of... school starting maybe... for them and for me.

Im really tired of being poor. I can't figure it out?? I was yelling at God last night (in my head- the kids were home) and I had tears rolling down my cheeks that they noticed......

Aaron is in Utah at the salt flats.... he needed a vacation and it has been awhile since he had one That's what the kids said. He just got back from Cali with them. That wasn't one? He needed one cuz he works so hard?? Houston....... I have a problem with that!! What is it that you are trying to tell me Dad that Im not getting???? I don't get it.

Maybe its just that Im under a lot of stress for some reason- I mean usually I look forward to school starting and our routnine starting. This year is going to be different. I won't be able to slack on Aaron's homework and I will have my own... and Im scared about starting school (again) with all these young things that I could have birthed. Almost done. I am almost done!

My blood results came back very good. Im healthy as a horse as far as that goes! That is a cheerful thing. The alergies is the only bad thing on there and that Im borderline anemic, but I already knew that. How can I be so borderline anemic with all the protein that I eat?? I crave protein. I have to have it for breakfast, lunch and dinner or I feel funny. We'll see what the doc says, but YEA!!! My blood is GOOD!!!

Now if my innards are good..... I really want to stop drinking for a while.... I need to practice not drinking in social situations just like I practiced with not wasting my time drinking at home, alone all summer..... I conquered that one pretty quickly and its no big deal.... I just have to make it a goal and wala!!!

So, I made my mother a FB page today. She doesn't know. Paula still has to bring her a laptop. I think that will work good. She is on my mind again. This time I put her on the D.O.T.R prayer list- well, not her, but for my relationship with her. I have GOT to get this resolved!! I want to try once more to take her to the veggie store with me..... I need to pick a day and make plans.... maybe tonight because that way I can get veggies and fruit for the kids lunches and they can go with me and we can walk her there, it won't be too hot. I will call and leave her a message to prepare her.

Well, my alarm is going off AGAIN. I kind of got up on time this morning. I need to wake the kids.... We never practiced going to bed early or getting up early.. uh oh

I spent all morning on my mother's email and FB... now its exercise time and shower time.....

Had good dreams last night about an unknown man..... walking in the rain.... holding hands..... giggling...... smiles and kisses.... ahhhh...... someday, someday.....